Victory Martial Arts-Founder speaks about the Success Secret no one talks about.

One thing can hold you back..

There is one success secret that’s often overlooked and not talked about much.

What is it?

Let me explain. One of the things that commonly abort our future success has to do with people. Not everyone that has exited your life was a wrong person. Pause and think about this while I give you some personal examples to get you thinking.

How this is still effecting my life..a personal example!

As a martial arts instructor for 30 years I have had many instructors. One in particular had made HUGE investments in me, introduced me to other instructors and asked them to teach and certify me. He groomed me to be his #1 Protege ( my instructor certificate from him has the number #001 ).

What did I do when he moved to LA to teach at the World Famous “Inosanto Academy”? I did not reach out to him to ask how to continue to study with him, ask him who I should train with and how I could continue to support a man that put so much into me. BUT I DIDN’T! I instantly sought a new instructor and I did not contact my teacher or follow up. I basically just moved on…Until years later!

Do I think that affected my future success? Without a doubt! I

Me and my dear Instructor Ron Bailicki in the mid 80s doing a demo for kids with LIVE BLADES – Yup we were a little crazy!

learned so much from this man, he gave me experiences and taught me things that were priceless and I stopped paying him HONOR.

I ran into him years later to pick up a instructor for a seminar at the airport. I was shocked to run into him, it had been 10 years since I saw him. I apologized for my behavior and as the man he is, he showed grace an accepted my apology and we moved forward.

Was the relationship the same? NO

I am glad that we moved forward and he forgave me BUT I believe that this man was assigned to help me succeed and for 10 years I made less progress then I could have, and even now my instructor is guarded with me. For 10 years, I had aborted a relationship that was given to me to improve me. That is time I can never get back. Plus the underlying feelings of guilt during the 10 years once I realized I did not honor him affected me in a more profound way than i could imagine.

NOT EVERYONE THAT WALKED OUT OF YOUR LIFE WAS A WRONG PERSON FOR YOU.

I once had an instructor that was working for Victory…

He was a well liked Instructor who was very skilled. I just could not get him to follow some Instructor protocols. As time went on, it was apparent he was not going to change this behavior. He eventually moved away and lost contact.

Years later he sent me a letter with money in it. The letter stated that for years he had been taking the money from the HONOR box for drinks. He said that knowing he did not do the right thing by stealing was eating him up and that he felt like he could not move forward in his life without getting this right. I was a RIGHT person in his life that he did wrong and he needed it to make it right. I report that he is doing well and we are in right standing with each other. Was it affecting his life for years? YES!

My 2nd Jiu Jitsu Instructor… and what he would not change…

Another Instructor I was bringing in to teach us Jiu Jitsu in the early 90’s would come in and beat the heck out of my students. This Brazilian was not well known in the states and in fact worked a full time job. Coming into do 3-4 seminars was a great gig for him and I felt compelled to help him get more well known. I begged and pleaded for him to adjust his training methods so students would get more out of it. He refused and eventually I had to stop bringing him in for the safety of my students. Years later, he is still unknown, with a small group of students.

He never followed up again, never apologized and offered to come in with a new Jiu Jitsu seminar methodology. I was in a position to help him but that door was closed.

I could go on and on about the irreplaceable losses I have seen by letting RIGHT people leave your life. It just too easy!

Do I think you can still succeed after we have made a mistake like this? YES…But it just take longer and it takes more effort because all of us will encounter a few GOLDEN SHORTCUTS that come in life and they ALWAYS come through GOLDEN RELATIONSHIPS.

If you have RIGHT people that you have allowed to exit your life, I challenge you to go into 2014 establishing that connection again.

3 Master Keys to Re establishing Golden Relationships.

1. LOOK THROUGH THE EYES OF HONOR. Stop and ask yourself with whom have you been dishonorable too. But your ego aside. Look at the people who have exited your life for the last 10 years and ask yourself if you have been dishonorable in any way or did they just exit. Not every relationship is worth salvaging but remember GOLDEN RELATIONSHIPS are people who invested into you and did nothing to you.

2. APOLOGIZE EFFECTIVELY. This is an art and many time where we have difficulty. Use no EXCUSES! State what you did, ask for forgiveness and offer some kind of restitution to show your sincerity.

3. CULTIVATE THE RELATIONSHIP. Follow up and build trust overtime. Even after an effective apology it may take years to develop that relationship.

Why is this important?

No one succeeds on their own, their are people that have exited our life because of our actions and now our growth is stunted because that person holds a key to your success and was willing to help you

As I take this challenge on I hope you will take it with me: Go over the 3 steps above and go make things right.

Remember the WAY you EXIT one SEASON, is the WAY you enter the NEXT SEASON.

Let’s go into 2014 with no hindrances in our minds or hearts of people that we did not do right. So we can be free to succeed in 2014. And maybe restore some Golden Relationships that will springboard your success.

Thanks for reading this precious friend!

Watch facebook on New Years day for another post I am working on about what you do with your time in 2014.

If you liked this post would you hit the Google + button at the top right hand side of this page? Thank you so much!

See you soon at the Riccardo Cup Submission Grappling Tournament.

In your corner,

Dion Riccardo

PS. If your a past student of Victory and had to stop for whatever reason, we would like to hear from you. Please contact us we would love to talk to you and see if we can help you in whatever way that we can. We miss you!

Shawn-I miss you!

PSS. As I write this I can’t help but to think of the legend “ShawnTompkins”. We had so many plans to help each other. 3 Weeks after coming in for 4 days to discuss business and teach a seminar he suddenly died of natural cause. I miss him. A golden relationship that I wish I have pursued earlier on but am so much better that I got to spend time with him. Thank you Shawn!

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About Dion Riccardo